Astronaut v. Astronomer

The Astronaut walks back to the oak.

He reaches into a pocket of his jumpsuit and pulls out a tube labeled "Clams in Garlic & White Wine". After examining the nutrient content, he eats the tube's contents, rolling gently as the course progresses. Then he pulls out a tube labeled "Simple Country Salad" and eats that. Then he pulls out one labeled "Acorn-Fed Virginia Country Ham With Pineapple-Grapefruit Dijon Glaze" and eats that. Then one that reads, "Roasted Asparagus with Thyme" and eats that. Then "A Very Simple Sweet Potato (Or Yam)" and eats that. Then "Scalloped Potatoes, Onions and Garlic" and eats that. Then "Garlic Herb Butter" and eats that. Then he pulls a Mars bar hidden in his sock, beneath his trouser leg, and eats that, too.

Then he takes a nap. Then he wakes and the Astronomer's standing nearby.

Hello there, says the Astronomer. Have a nice nap?

Yes, says the Astronaut, I sure did.

The Astronomer's a genial man in late middle-age, with thick brown-framed glasses, and white hair capped by a tweed touring hat. He wears a grey and green coat, a beige scarf.

Boy, the first thing I thought when I walked out here was what a fine place this would be to erect an observatory. It's remote, so there wouldn't be much light pollution. What do you think?

The Astronaut tells him it sounds like a good idea.

Holy moly! the Astronomer says, clapping his gloved hands together, looking up. What a view!

You know, says the Astronaut, I'm -

From NASA, huh? Heck that's great. Met the chief of your scientific branch not to long ago when I was down in Mexico. Archeoastronomy, you know. Great fun. Students love it.

Oh, I -

And he was a great guy, the chief, let me tell ya!

He -

You know most people think that only the Maya or the Aztec or the Inca practiced astronomy. Not true! North American tribes did, too! Mostly through traditions passed down by the Maya or Aztec. Along with blood rites!

The Astronomer discusses the astronomic practices of several North American tribes. The Astronaut listens patiently. Finally, about nine hours later, as night falls, the Astrologer decides they should get to the task at hand. So they both get their pistols and go to the field.

They raise their guns. Their guns go off.